The fat girl is crying inside tears under her laughter.
She bounces ’round the school yard and wants to be what boys are after.
Such a shame that she’s so fat
She might be pretty under that.
They never look at her that way, because they are superficial,
She weeps into pillow then decides to make it official.
Such a shame that she’s so fat
She could be pretty under that.
If boys can’t see how sweet she is beneath her layers of fat
She’ll be alone unless she drops the weight and that is that.
She spends some time and works a bit on losing what she can
She drops a few that thin her face and now she’ll snare her man.
Such a shame that she was fat
She’s mighty pretty under that.
She lies in wait for just the one Who doesn’t know her past
Before he can imagine what’s ahead she’ll snag him tightly fast.
Such a shame she’s been so fat
Everyone knows it’s under that.
And so it was, a handsome man came looking for a mate
A wedding day and he is snared not knowing what’s his fate.
Such a shame that she was fat
He sees a beauty under that.
The joy of having kids to love can’t quite remove the loathing
she feels when she looks in the mirror and soon she stops her doting.
Such a shame that she’s so fat
and rather bitchy on top of that.
Her handsome man becomes a source of constant humiliation
She wants to be what she can not Her bitterness infuses frustation.
Such a shame that she’s so fat
She should be jolly under that.
Because she can’t accept herself, she compensates with work
She wants everyone to admire her wherever she should lurk.
With strength of will she bends all ears to make them see her side
They buy from her and sing her praise while hubby sees her lies.
Such a shame that she’s so fat
Her husband loves her under that.
From time to time a program comes along and she drops pounds
The success makes her elated and she tells everyone around.
She is trapped in self-disgust in her body that is fat.
Because inevitably it all comes back and more on top of that
There’s only one success in life she’s nothing if not thin
She desperate now to be the girl who always gets to win.
Such a shame that she’s so fat
She’s sure successful besides that.
.
No matter if she has success and earns a lot of money
The truth of who she really is is certainly not funny.
Inside’s the little fat girl who is self-absorbed and cruel
She’s so desperate for admiration that it only serves to fuel
Control o’er all who come to her thinking she is kind and true
But watch yourself, she’ll take all you’ve got ’til there’s nothing left of you.
Such a shame that she’s like that
No heart is left beneath the fat.
.
.
This poem is rooted in that aphorism “Wherever you go, there you are.” Some people blame a lot of things for their sense of unfulfillment– their weight, their race, their spouse, their circumstances, having kids, not having kids, etc. Although we all have challenges to overcome, it’s always our own life, and our character is revealed in how we deal with those challenges. So here is a narrative of a woman who was obsessed by the needy fat child within her and how she lets that child run her life. It’s an extended metaphor. It is a cautionary tale. Those inner children should not be allowed to run amok! They are like Stephenie Meyer’s Immortal Children in Breaking Dawn– they destroy all around them, while the creators lose everything in the fight to save them. Sometimes we have to destroy the inner child in order to save ourselves and our relationships.
Shawn L. Bird 
Night warmth December 3, 2010
Tags: free verse, love, poem, poetry
Beneath my pillow
Left hands woven together in the night
Rings touching
Cold feet pressed into warm shins
Arms encircling.
Breath moves through my hair,
a breathing blessing.
We’re facing the same direction
In sleep
In life
And in love.
.
.
Submitted as part of Thursday poets’ rally. Week 34
Rally participants, please include a link to your own entry within your comment. This makes it easier for both rally participants and the general public to discover your poetry. Looking forward to reading!
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