This is Pink Shirt Day, and it’s a day to talk openly about bullying. In schools all over Canada, teachers and students put on pink shirts and take a stand against bullying.
It’s a day to confront victimization, and a day to talk about personal ethics amid hypocrisy.
When I ask a class full of teens whether they’ve ever been bullied, every hand goes up. Every kid knows what it feels like to be looked down on, pushed around, and belittled.
Then I ask them, how many of them have ever bullied someone else, and the hands rise again. Not usually all the hands this time, but awfully close. 95 per cent, say. Let’s be honest, who hasn’t snapped at his sibling, made a rude remark about the kid who wasn’t cool, just so you’d feel a little better about your own status?
“Look! I belong because you don’t.”
So wearing a pink shirt is fine, and I’ll be wearing mine. But I’ll be asking the hard questions. Not just “Did you feel bad when you were bullied?” but “Why did you do it to someone else?” “Why do you gain your personal power on the back of someone’s self-esteem? ”
Kids don’t get shaken down for lunch money any more. I’ve never seen a kid shoved into a locker who didn’t request his friends help him get in.
Kids learn to bully.
We have role models after all, of what civilized behavior looks like. We watch our political leaders shout obnoxious comments back and forth in the House of Commons and in our provincial Legislatures.
We watch talk show hosts encourage guests to jump on one another, as we gleefully anticipate the moment when all hell breaks loose.
We scream obscenities at rival sports teams.
We insult other cultures and religions. Red, brown, black, yellow, white. Everybody seems to have a colour that isn’t quite right.
We send soldiers to settle issues by fighting.
Why wouldn’t kids bully each other, when that’s what they see modeled every day?
So wear your pink shirt, but don’t think it’s going to stop anything, until the leaders quit using violence, obscenity and insult to get their way.
Don’t allow yourself to be bullied.
Take a stand and celebrate your unique place in the world.
Demand the respect you deserve.
Be proud you’re you.
.
.
Rather than feeling sorry for yourself, stand up proudly.
Don’t allow yourself to be bullied.
Take a stand and celebrate your unique place in the world.
I read this quote in the book Blueprints for Better Girls (which was painful to read and not about bettering anyone). The quote is interesting. I suspect that one could ruminate for a long time on all the permutations it triggers. I think it will mean something new to you almost every time you consider it.
Kruger is an artist who creates these slogans as a kind of anti-establishment declaration, meant to challenge the viewer. You can read more about her in this article from Mother Jones magazine.
My first connection to this quote was to recall a youthful romance. It could have been spoken by the young man. In reality, he did not become what he meant to me. And yet he did, because I fashioned him in the image I desired, and so he remained in memory, inviolate.
My children could say this to me. I could say it to them.
In some ways, it’s a fatalistic thought. We are bound to disappoint. In other ways, it’s a liberating thought. We are imperfect, and accepting that, we are free to be whoever we grow to be.
I don’t think corporate greed should put life at risk. I think longevity and a healthy environment to support it are more important than short term gains. I don’t like that our political cartoonists can be gagged.
At present in BC, a war is raging between Enbridge, which wants to put a pipeline across the province and bring in super-tankers to haul oil to China, and a growing number of people who don’t feel the short term economic gain is worth the potential risk to the environment.
Enbridge has a terrible record for spills along their pipelines, and the coast at the proposed location is a tricky channel that is crucial to the food fishery. Enbridge has already tried to mislead the public on the safety of that, but they were caught. (See the misleading ad here) In short, we’re offered a few construction jobs versus destruction of a few crucial eco-systems with devastating long term effects.
When I was in Junior high I was known as Shawna, because one teacher in elementary couldn’t get it that my name was SHAWN and that ended up on my records. By the end of high school, I had finally gotten Shawna off all my records.
At our high school reunion this summer, a class mate said, “Your name tag says ‘Shawn.'”
“Yes.” I agreed.
“This yearbook says Shawn,” he said glancing back to the copy Ralph had brought along.
“Yes.” I was on the yearbook committee. I made sure my name was spelled correctly. I also did the calligraphy on our diplomas, so it’s correct there, as well.
“But we always called you Shawna,” he said, looking down on me with confusion.
“Yes.”
“Did we have it WRONG all those years?” His eyes were wrinkled in dismay.
I laughed and said, “Yes.”
He gave me the most sincere look of mortification and said, “I’m sosorry!”
I laughed and told him it was quite all right. The kids I hung around with all knew my name. I wasn’t to concerned about the rest of them, to be honest.
Then I went to Finland, and there they call me either “Soon” (rhymes with ‘phone’) or gave me the Finnish name “Sanna.” When I introduce myself in Finnish, that’s who I am. In French I’m “Jeanne.” In Italian I’m “Gianna.” My doctor calls me “Shawnee.” I am all those people, and all those identities. Each one is essentially the same, but a little bit different. A different language for communication, a slightly different attitude.
So far, I don’t use a pseudonym with my writing, though I imagine eventually I will.
What is your experience? Have you been known by different names? Are you exactly the same, depending upon your name?
Names are important to us. For one thing, they tie us to this world; the ground us in reality somewhat. If you know your True Name–not everyone in our world finds it–you’re more “real” than if you don’t know who you are. And for a race that has a tendency to fade away if we’re forgotten, that’s kind of a big deal.
Julie Kagawa in Summer’s Crossing.
So what isyour true name? Do you know your own true name intrinsically, or do you learn it as you grow? Is your name the one your parents wrote on your birth certificate, or the pet name they called you as you grew? Is it more like the cultures who wait until your character discloses your name?
Kagawa says you need to know your true name to become real.
Under clear skies, we have a lovely view of Mount Ida and the Fly Hills from the living room. At the moment, hills are obscured by low cloud, and snow blankets the neighbourhood. It’s barely freezing, and the snow is perfect for construction of snow forts and snowmen
Shawn L. Bird 
pink shirts February 27, 2013
Tags: anti-bullying, Balpreet Kaur, bullying, facial hair, pink shirt day, Shane Koyczan, Sikh, stand, To This Day
This is Pink Shirt Day, and it’s a day to talk openly about bullying. In schools all over Canada, teachers and students put on pink shirts and take a stand against bullying.
It’s a day to confront victimization, and a day to talk about personal ethics amid hypocrisy.
When I ask a class full of teens whether they’ve ever been bullied, every hand goes up. Every kid knows what it feels like to be looked down on, pushed around, and belittled.
Then I ask them, how many of them have ever bullied someone else, and the hands rise again. Not usually all the hands this time, but awfully close. 95 per cent, say. Let’s be honest, who hasn’t snapped at his sibling, made a rude remark about the kid who wasn’t cool, just so you’d feel a little better about your own status?
“Look! I belong because you don’t.”
So wearing a pink shirt is fine, and I’ll be wearing mine. But I’ll be asking the hard questions. Not just “Did you feel bad when you were bullied?” but “Why did you do it to someone else?” “Why do you gain your personal power on the back of someone’s self-esteem? ”
Kids don’t get shaken down for lunch money any more. I’ve never seen a kid shoved into a locker who didn’t request his friends help him get in.
Kids learn to bully.
We have role models after all, of what civilized behavior looks like. We watch our political leaders shout obnoxious comments back and forth in the House of Commons and in our provincial Legislatures.
We watch talk show hosts encourage guests to jump on one another, as we gleefully anticipate the moment when all hell breaks loose.
We scream obscenities at rival sports teams.
We insult other cultures and religions. Red, brown, black, yellow, white. Everybody seems to have a colour that isn’t quite right.
We send soldiers to settle issues by fighting.
Why wouldn’t kids bully each other, when that’s what they see modeled every day?
So wear your pink shirt, but don’t think it’s going to stop anything, until the leaders quit using violence, obscenity and insult to get their way.
Don’t allow yourself to be bullied.
Take a stand and celebrate your unique place in the world.
Demand the respect you deserve.
Be proud you’re you.
.
.
Rather than feeling sorry for yourself, stand up proudly.
Don’t allow yourself to be bullied.
Take a stand and celebrate your unique place in the world.
Demand the respect you deserve.
Be proud you’re you.
Like Balpreet Kaur of Ohio State University, whose intelligent and courteous response to cyber-bullies taught them something valuable. When Kaur was mocked for her facial hair, which she isn’t allowed to cut because she is a devout Sikh, she took the time to explain her faith, and in so doing, made the bullies aware of their small-mindedness.
Don’t allow yourself to be bullied.
Take a stand and celebrate your unique place in the world.
Demand the respect you deserve.
Be proud you’re you.
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