Shawn L. Bird

Original poetry, commentary, and fiction. All copyrights reserved.

poem-princess? February 6, 2016

Filed under: Poetry — Shawn L. Bird @ 4:43 pm
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She says she’s not waiting for a handsome prince

and laughs like she’s joking.

But she had a handsome prince

and she she treated him like a frog,

so if one was to come along now,

I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t even recognize him.

 

poem-considerations September 20, 2014

Between you and me,

there is respect,

and respect has room

for secrets.

But let there be

no lies

between you and me,

for what lies

between us

is going to be

growing

timelessly.

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Another #Outlander poem.

Re: ch 15

(I confess, I missed this speech in ep 107.  I trust it will show up eventually).

 

poem-thanks November 23, 2013

Filed under: Poetry — Shawn L. Bird @ 7:41 pm
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I thanked the cleaner

in the hotel wash room

for her good work, and the pride

the staff showed in keeping a wonderful

establishment pristine.

As I left the room

a lady following me said,

“That was very kind of you,

cleaners don’t hear that often enough.”

But she did not

say thank you

herself.

 

memory- This One’s for Shawn August 9, 2013

Earlier this week, Diana Gabaldon dedicated her Daily Lines to me, and sent out to her 250,000 fans on Facebook and Twitter the message #ThisOnesForShawnLBird.  I was just remembering another time when my heart was warmed to bursting by a dedication from someone I looked up to.

Once upon a time, when I was 15 or so, a boy I adored worked once a week as a Disc Jockey on a late night radio show in Calgary.  Some nights, even though I lived 650 km away on the other side of the Rocky Mountains,  I could listen to him on the skip that happens when meteorological conditions were good.  One night I called him up to say I was listening, and he dedicated this song to me.  I have the dedication on tape, and when I hear it, it still chokes me up!  If you have fond memories of your first love, you may want to get out a handkerchief.

“This one goes all the way out to Kelowna, BC.  This one’s for Shawn…”

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(I sing “Share this thought with me” as “You shared the start with me”  Hmm.  Either way!

How about you?  Do you have fond memories of a very public dedication you received from someone special?  Tell us about it!

 

charity and obligation May 1, 2012

Filed under: Pondering — Shawn L. Bird @ 5:29 pm
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There are some things that we do because we want to, and just the doing of those things is a pleasure in itself.  We don’t expect recognition, or seek it, and that is quite okay.

Sometimes we have to do things that we’d rather not do, and the only value in those activities is the recognition that it brings.  When you don’t like shovelling manure, you want to get paid for having a ‘crappy’ job!  I don’t mean those days when the scent of manure makes you euphorically pastoral.  I mean the days when it’s a miserable drudge, and you don’t want to do it.  You do what you have to do, and you gather your pay cheque, and use that money to buy something you need or you want.  You sacrifice a little something for the filthy lucre.

Sometimes your sacrifice is your time.  Sometimes your investment is emotional.  Sometimes you go out of your way to help someone when you’d rather be doing your own thing.  You may feel obligated to help out due to friendship or family commitments.  You ‘lend’ a friend or family member $500 knowing  full well that you’ll never see it again.  You make a sacrifice on their behalf, and it’s fine.  You do what you have to do.  It’s not out of line to expect to hear a simple, “Thank you.”  Not marching bands or ticker tape parades, just a simple, “I appreciate your effort.”  It’s nice to have someone recognise that you have helped them out at some personal cost.

I’m staring at my 20 year old couches at the moment, swathed in their dog safe covers, and I’m feeling quite grumpy that I don’t have the replacement ones that I’d been visiting at ScanDesign for 4 years.  I dreamed about them.  They were $10,000.  I visited them a lot, but they were well out of the budget, due to the expenses of the household.  The couches have been discontinued, and so I’ll never be able to get them now.  If I had not been making sacrifices on behalf of someone else, I could have had my couches.  It makes me see sad to realise that I sacrificed my fantastic leather, fully reclining, gorgeous eKornes couches for someone who has turned out to be completely unworthy.

It makes me so upset that I have wasted my efforts for years being helpful and supportive to someone who plainly needed to learn about sacrifice and independence the hard way.  Sometimes when we try to ease someone’s path, we deprive them of experience they need to appreciate the value of their own efforts, and to be appreciative of help when it comes.  I regret this person’s ignorance and attitude, while I mourn the loss of opportunity that I could have given someone who would have appreciated it more (like my dogs or myself).

I confess to being more than a little concerned, because once this person was respectful, kind, considerate, and responsible.    Things change apparently.  I know better, now.  I won’t be offering support any longer.  I’ll cut my losses and I’ll invest where the return is better.

 

ironies April 26, 2012

Filed under: Commentary — Shawn L. Bird @ 5:50 pm
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I was just noticing one of the ironies of personal communication.

Someone can crush your heart by their behaviour, and if you choose to tell them, in hopes that they will change the behaviour, or at least recognize that there is another perspective,  with alarming frequency, instead of acknowledging your hurt, they will deny it.  Beyond just denying your feelings, they frequently turn around and get angry at you for being hurt.

This is a very good argument for never allowing anyone to have the power to touch your heart, isn’t it? Affection is a messy business, and when the people we trust to be safe havens for our trust prove unworthy, it can be particularly nasty.

If the attacks prove consistent, and it’s a friend who is the source of hurt, then you can cut them out of your life.  It is simple enough to fade away.   Sometimes though, you’re actually related to the person who is routinely disrespectful to you, and then things get more complicated!

Parents are particularly prone to this experience about the time their kids hit puberty.  All those precious moments of mutual adoration suddenly come to a screeching halt and the poor parents are left wondering who put that unreasonable banchee into their kid’s bedroom. What once was a relationship of caring becomes one of distrust. All motives are presumed to be cruel and vindictive. All common courtesies are seen as violations of liberty.  How do you deal with the lack of respect and consideration when the source lives in the same house?  That’s a recipe for some serious stress.

I hang around with a lot of teen-agers, of course, and I see a lot of shell-shocked parents.

I already shared in a past blog about The Cat Years. It’s a lovely metaphor about how our happy, friendly little dogs (pre-teens) hit puberty and turn into taciturn cats. The premise is that if we keep trying to treat them like dogs, we’ll be unhappy. Instead, parents need to acknowledge they now have cats in the house, and change their behavior. Cats have different needs than dogs.

A little TLC for the parents is required during the process, though. Long walks, spa visits, spousal affection, concerts… Eventually it gets better. Eventually the kids learn that their parents are worthy of respect and kindness. Some just take longer than others to become happy puppies again.  Occasionally they revert to being cats again.

In the meantime, one can appreciate the irony, without appreciating it.

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(PS. Yes, grammar nazis, I used the singular pronoun ‘someone’ with the plural pronoun ‘they’ but you know as well as I do that that is common use as a neutral singular pronoun, and there’s no way we’re going to win the fight to stop it).

 

 
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