Shawn L. Bird

Original poetry, commentary, and fiction. All copyrights reserved.

bad memory December 23, 2011

Filed under: Pondering — Shawn L. Bird @ 3:15 pm
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The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time.

Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 – 1900)

I laughed when I read this.  I can report that it is completely true, as I enjoy books and music for the first time, though I have read them many times previously.  Sometimes I feel like I can’t hold a thought in my head.  It’s not really as bad as all that, but I feel often that memory is like an apple barrel.  The old memories are down deep in the barrel, still there, although perhaps not as pristine as they once were.  The memories on the top of the barrel, however, are balanced a trifle precariously, and are prone to rolling down the pile and off under a counter.

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apple cinnamon scones October 15, 2011

Filed under: Recipes — Shawn L. Bird @ 8:30 pm
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To be honest, these might not technically be scones, because of the whole rolling thing, but the dough is a basic biscuit dough like one uses for scones, so that’s what I’m calling this creation I came up with this evening.

The crust is very flaky and flavourful.  I cannot make pie crust to save my life, but no one will complain if I make this instead!

Pre-heat oven to 400F.  Serves 8, or two with left-overs!  ;-P

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Dice one tart cooking apple (I used an Ambrosia) into approx 1/4″ cubes (or you could grate it instead), toss with 1 tsp cinnamon, 1 tbsp Demarara or brown sugar, 1 tbsp melted butter.

In another bowl, mix 2 c flour, 1 tbsp white sugar, 1.5 tsp baking power, 1 tsp salt. Cut in 1/4 c butter with pastry blender. Add in 1 c milk.  Mix well.

Turn out onto counter, Roll into a 12″ square. Spread apple filling onto dough, leaving 1′ border. Roll up. Squish down, keeping filling in! So it’s about 1″ high. Cut into 2 scones, each about 4″ X 6″.

Bake for 25 mins 400 F.

Melt 1 tbsp of butter. Brush scones with butter, sprinkle with a thin coating of icing sugar and cinnamon. Replace in the oven and bake for 4-5 more minutes.

To serve, slice each scone into 4 slices and serve with whipped cream or ice cream along the side.

SOOOOO yummy!

 

Rotten apple! June 3, 2011

Filed under: Commentary — Shawn L. Bird @ 7:45 pm
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There are people out there who love Apple products.  They glow about how ‘intuitive’ the programs are and how little problem they have using them.

I am  not one of them.

I think I can say quite categorically that I actually despise Apple.

I was given an iPhone.  I didn’t want one. I liked my cute little flip phone with an easy to remember number.  I liked to flip it open and imagine I was in a Star Trek episode, ready to ask Scotty to beam me up.  It did one thing, and it did it well.

I have had a stack of CDs that I want to load onto the iPod app on the phone.  I dutifully load them into iTunes library (a  hellish and confusing place that does not bear any resemblance to the wonderful, soothing, physical libraries in my world). 

Time to sync the iPhone to the iTune library and load up all the updates.  Click.

Up pops a warning “You have purchased items on your iPhone that are not in your iTunes library.  You should transfer them to iTunes library before proceeding.”

Okay.

Um.

How?

So I type the keywords into the “Help” menu.  In Word that always brings me the file I want, and it one or two clicks I’ve figured out everything I need to know.  Not in iTunes apparently.  30 ‘helpful’ boxes appeared.  I clicked and scrolled, but NOT ONE of them told me how to transfer my purchased iPhone apps into my iTunes library.  NO HELP just Hell.  After an hour of raising my blood pressure, I have given up, tossing electronics across the desk and standing with enough force to propel the office chair on a Homeric Odyssey.

I have left my iPhone plugged into iTunes in the basement.  I will hurt it if I see it until my rational brain function is restored.  I have recalled that the last time I tried to sync my iPhone, and the time before when I had the iPod Touch before it was stolen, I had the same problem.  It wouldn’t let me save the files that were on the other devise.  Those times, I gave up and just synced and lost them.  I presume the apps in question are my French subway maps, verb books and dictionary. I did pay actual money for them, and it’d be nice to keep them.

It would be nice if Apple would tell me HOW to do it, instead of just telling me to do it.

It makes me very sure that I will never own an Apple computer.  If a tiny devise like this is so hard to work with, what are larger ones like?  I will stick to my nice little notebook computer (smaller than a text book). 

I’d like my Walkman back, too.

 

Apple cinnamon rolls May 25, 2010

Filed under: Recipes — Shawn L. Bird @ 12:12 am
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I made up this recipe today and am thrilled with the results! You definitely want to try these!  So incredibly yummy you won’t believe it.

Preheat your oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit.  Grease a 12 pocket muffin tin.

Start with a basic biscuit recipe- mix 2 cups of flour, 4 tsp of baking powder, 1/2 tsp of salt and 2 tbsp of sugar.  Cut in 1/4 c of cold butter until it’s all crumbly.  Add a cup of milk.  Mix until combined and then roll out into a rectangle about 10X15 inches.

Next mix 2 tbsp of butter (room temperature) with 1 tbsp of cinnamon, 1 c of brown sugar, and grate one medium tart apple (Spartans for us).  Mix well. Spread this filling  evenly over the rectangle, right to the edges.

Now starting from a long side gently roll your dough up into a log.  Cut into 4 equal sections, then divide each quarter into thirds.  Gently place each roll into a compartment of the muffin tin.  Bake at 400 for 20 mins. 

Let stand only 2 or 3 mins before removing from the tin, or they will glue in!  Cool on racks.  Be sure to scrape up any syrup on the bottom to put back on the rolls.  Mmmmm. 

Let me know  how you like them!

 

 
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