Shawn L. Bird

Original poetry, commentary, and fiction. All copyrights reserved.

please never die! August 30, 2012

This is purely selfish, I know.

Since October 2011, I’ve been obsessed with author Diana Gabaldon and her Outlander series (though I read anything by her I can find: the Lord John series, blog posts, articles, tweets, Facebook postings).  Like millions of rabid fans around the world, I am waiting desperately for the next installment in in the adventures of Claire and Jamie Fraser, et al.  Written in My Own Heart’s Blood (aka MOBY) isn’t due until SEPTEMBER 2013!

>>Insert anguished groan here<<

Recently, Diana went to Scotland to celebrate the wedding of her daughter.  I found myself praying passionately that there would be no plane, train, bus, ferry, or auto accidents.  What if Diana was to expire in some sort of dramatic, Fraser worthy way?  She puts her characters through enough, fate might just mock her with an ironic  twist, and she could be caught in such a scenario up close and personally!  Worse, some ignominious event could fell her, some blip of biology could shut down that brilliant brain and still that witty pen.

😦  NOOOOOOOOO!  The very idea makes my heart pound in dread.

Yesterday, in my audio book of Gabaldon’s Drums of Autumn, Jamie fought off a bear with a dirk, bare hands, and sheer determination.  (Claire contributed to his defence by whacking at the combatants with a dead fish).  After this attack, Claire shakily observes,

Anytime. It could happen anytime, and just this fast. I wasn’t sure which seemed most unreal; the bear’s attack, or this, the soft summer night, alive with promise.

I rested mv head on my knees, letting the sickness, the residue of shock, drain away. It didn’t matter, I told myself Not only anytime, but anywhere. Disease, car wreck, random bullet. There was no true refuge for anyone, but like most people, I managed not to think of that most of the time.

I am not a worry-wart.  I have a generally relaxed, laissez-faire attitude about most things.  I believe in doing what you can, and then letting go.  I wait without anxious fear for results of jobs, test results, admissions, reviews, and queries. Impatient curiosity may cause frustration, but not anxiety.  My kids and husband are on their own, provided only with my good wishes and sensible advice.  I never panic over their prospective demises, despite their penchants for death defying recreational activities that would indicate I really should.  Yet, Diana Gabaldon’s books can keep me up all night, fretting about how things are going to turn out for a character who’s stuck in another impossible situation.  Her fictional world stresses me out far more than the real world does.

I love her for it.

So I worry about Herself .*   This is slightly absurd, and definitely selfish.    I know it, and yet I can’t help it.

Please be immortal, Diana.  Or at least, get yourself into a time loop next time you’re in Scotland.  I recommend looking for wild flowers at the base of standing stones around Beltane.

*I also worry,  not infrequently, about Davina Porter, narrator of the Outlander audio books, for much the same reasons.  She HAS to keep narrating this series!  She can’t die or retire!

Imagine my head, cupped in my hands, shaking in embarrassment.  This is quite pathetic, but very real.  Am I alone in this absurdity?  Tell me someone else shares author anxiety?

July/2013 Especially now that MOBY won’t be released until March 2014 now!

 

camstairy coccygodynians August 27, 2012

I think my favorite line from the Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon might be in Drums of Autumn when Roger observes,

“Coccygodynians are camstairy by nature”

An English teacher, by nature, is thoroughly entertained by word play, and delighted with novel phraseology.  Gabaldon frequently provides such fun, and that quote is an example.  Roger and Bree are playing The Minister’s Cat, a word game where they work through the alphabet, labelling the poor cat with adjectives of increasing complexity.  They called this round a draw.

For your edification: coccygodynia is a pain in the region of the coccyx (tail bone), so Bree’s doctor mother identified the hospital administrators as coccygodynians,  i.e.  “pains in the butt.”  Camstairy is a little more layered.  It’s a Scot’s term that Roger claims means ‘quarrelsome,’ but assorted on-line dictionaries offer definitions of ‘unmanageable,’ ‘unruly,’ and ‘obstinate,’ which add some colourful possibilities!

I trust that your day will be free from camstairy coccygodynians! 😉

 

creating beauty August 5, 2012

Filed under: OUTLANDERishness,Pondering — Shawn L. Bird @ 6:06 pm
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“You are beautiful,” he whispered to me
“If you say so.”
“Do ye not believe me? Have I ever lied to you?”
“That’s not what I mean. I mean— if you say it, then it’s true.”

Diana Gabaldon.  The Fiery Cross

I have pondered over this concept a lot.  When Grace first sees Ben in Grace Awakening Dreams, she thinks he’s completely average and uninteresting.  By the end of Grace Awakening Power, she describes him as handsome, golden, and glorious.

What has changed?  Has he literally become better looking, or has her perception of him just altered, so that she finds him more attractive?  Does being in love, and having someone love you make you more attractive?

I think the answer to all three questions is yes.

It reminds me of a parable I heard when I was a teen about the 100 cow wife.  Hunting on the internet, I see that it’s actually about an 8 cow wife.   (lol  Memory inflation!)  The gist of the story is that you get what you pay for.  If you want a beauty, you have to treat her like a beauty.

Physical beauty, internal beauty, or whatever, your declaration to the beloved is what makes it true.  Conversely, if you denigrate your spouse, call him or her names, and put him or her down, you create what you declare.  You create what you desire and what you declare.

 

sex scenes July 24, 2012

Filed under: OUTLANDERishness,Writing — Shawn L. Bird @ 9:16 am
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I have been writing a brand of YA that leaves sex scenes safely out of the picture, and firmly entrenched in the reader’s imagination.  But eventually the time will come (reasonably soon in the process of writing Grace Beguiling, I think!) when I will have to write a real scene involving sex, and I can only hope that I will do it as well as Outlander author Diana Gabaldon does.  I will be following her advice from this article, because Diana Gabaldon is a master of honest, well-crafted, realistic, brilliantly steamy sex scenes!

 

There is no time between hearts June 6, 2012

Yesterday I was blessed to have a visit from dear friends of my teenage years.  It has been over 20 years since I last saw them, because they now live in Ottawa, some 4000 km away.  We keep in touch through letters (the paper kind!) and Facebook, so we have exchanged photos and life events, but we haven’t seen each other in lifetimes (those of 3 children between us, I think)

The door bell rang, they stepped inside, and it was as if our last visit was yesterday.  It gives a glimpse into the concept of eternity.  If our own experience is that time folds upon itself when old friends come together, a life time is measured in a blink.

I’m reminded of Joe Abernathy’s comments to Claire with respect to high school reunions in Diana Gabaldon’s Dragonfly in Amber.  He says, “you see all these people you haven’t seen for twenty years, and there’s this split second when you meet somebody you used to know, when you think, ‘My God, he’s changed!,’ and then all of a sudden, he hasn’t—it’s just like the twenty years weren’t there.  I mean”—he rubbed his head vigorously, struggling for meaning—“you see they’ve  got some gray, and some lines, and maybe they aren’t just the same as they were, and you have to make yourself stand back a ways to see that they aren’t eighteen anymore.”

I sure wish Ottawa was a whole lot closer.  The worst thing about seeing someone you haven’t seen in 20 years is how much you wish you could spend  more time with them.  Good-byes are extra sad.

Thank heaven for Facebook. 🙂

 

vocabulary lessons with Diana Gabaldon June 3, 2012

I am an avid reader and an English teacher, so I have a pretty good vocabulary.  However, reading Diana Gabaldon has introduced me to many new words.  This is an ongoing effort to identify words I discovered through her books.  I am noting them as I re-read or as Diana posts Daily Lines of the latest book in progress.  Feel free to add your own additions in the comments!

OUBLIETTE. (Voyager, used metaphorically) a top loading dungeon (a.k.a. a thieves’ hole).  I find it amusing that this word wasn’t used while Claire was actually inside the thieves’ hole in Cranesmuir which is arguably a real oubliette.  Jamie uses the word to refer to being below deck on a ship.  It shows up again in Drums of Autumn, and this time young William is in an ‘oubliette.’  In that instance, it’s particularly funny, because William has, in fact, fallen into the privy.  Note the French root : Oublier (to forget).  As in, they’ll toss you in the dungeon and forget about you…  Luckily, no one forgets William in the privy hole.

 AVUNCULAR. (Drums of Autumn, the postman winks avuncularly) uncle-like. Ian uses the noun form Avunculus when writing to Jamie in Latin. Something like,  “Ian salutas Avunculus Jacobus.”  (I’ll correct that when I come across it during the re-read). s Avunculus Jacobus meaning Uncle James, of course.

ALACRITY (throughout the series).  Claire (and others) frequently do things eagerly or in cheerful readiness, i.e.  ‘with alacrity.’  I suspect this one of DG’s favourite words, actually.  Whenever Davina Porter says it in my audio books, I always grin and repeat solemnly, “with alacrity!” 🙂  When we hosted Diana here at our writers’ conference I gave her a dish towel I’d hand embroidered with “Do it with alacrity!” as a joke.  🙂

SMOOR is always used in Outlander  in the sense of  ‘to smoor the fire.’  It means ‘to smother’ in Scots.  One smothers the fire so it continues to burn slowly throughout the night.   There’s an interesting article about historical usage on the Scots Language Centre website.  Click to listen to it said, the ‘oooo’ is long and the /r/ rolls.  A lovely word spoken!  Smoor can be used to mean killing a person by depriving them of air or to mean snow covering something.  My favorite use is from that link, quoting Robert Louis Stevenson, (Merry Men 1887)  “a mune smoored wi’ mist.”  Isn’t that a romantic image for a moon being smothered by fog!

FRESHET (from Drums of Autumn).  Claire sees  freshets when she gets stranded between the Muellers and Frasers’ Ridge.  It’s a sudden overflowing of a stream due to heavy rains or rapid melting.

BATHYSPHERE.  I kid you not.  This one comes from a daily lines posting (Jun 6, 2012) of book 8 in the series  called Written in My Own Heart’s Blood (aka MOBY).  A bathysphere is a spherical chamber for deep diving.  Claire leaves a tense situation “breathing as if I’d just escaped from a bathysphere.”  This might just be my favourite Gabaldon word yet.

EXCRESCENCE- Claire uses it to describe the mob cap she’s been given by Granny Bacon in The Fiery Cross.  An excrescence is an outgrowth that’s the result of disease or abnormality, or an unattractive or superfluous addition.   I confess, this is a much milder definition than the one I had presumed.

DISQUISITION- This one came from a Facebook posting from Diana, but it’s also a humorous  article on her blog about “Butt-cooties.”  Disquisition is just a long word for ‘essay.’  As an English teacher, I will definitely be able to stick this one into my every day vocabulary!

INIMICAL- From Echo in the Bone.  It means tending to harm.  There was a strange sense of… “something waiting among the trees, not inimical, but not welcoming either.”

Click here to read a blog about CAMSTAIRY COCCYGODYNIANS.  Those are two of my favourite Gabaldon vocabulary words.  They’re from Drums of Autumn.

ABSQUATULATE- 29-01-13 Diana posted a Daily Line from MOBY (aka Written in My Own Heart’s Blood) with the following hashtag: #absquatulatemeansjustwhatyouthinkitdoes  The context is “He and Fraser had absquatulated onto the roof and down a drain-pipe, leaving William, clearly reeling with the shock of revelation, alone in the upstairs hallway.”  This word makes me laugh and shake my head.  It means to leave quickly.  To be honest, I was imagining from the context that it meant climb or clamber.  So, Diana, you were wrong.  It doesn’t mean just what I thought it did!

OLEAGINOUS- 04-04-2014 Diana posted a daily line from MOBY that said the surface of the butter was oleaginous.  i.e. greasy.  I like that this word can also mean obsequious.  I would have thought that was a satisfying enough option, but oleaginous is just so much better.  The butter was literally oleaginous, unlike pandering underlings.  Someday I’m using this word in a story. 🙂

SOUGH 14-07-2016 Daily line from book 9 Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone (aka GOBEE): “Together they stood listening, trying to still their pounding hearts and gasping breaths long enough to hear anything above the sough of the forest.”  Sough means moaning, rustling, or murmuring sound.  It rhymes with ‘cough.’

BEDIZENED 08-06-2017 Daily line from book 9 Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone (aka GOBEE):“For Angelina, unable or unwilling to bend her bedizened head enough to look down, was about to collide with the little platform on which the sitter’s chair was perched.”  Bedizened means dressed up or decorated gaudily.  Sounds like a lot of grad hair do’s we see this time of year.

FROWARD 2018-07-23 Daily line from book 9 Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone (aka GOBEE): “He’s Scottish,” I amended, with a sigh. “Which means stubborn. Also unreasonable, intolerant, contumelious, froward, pig-headed and a few other objectionable things.”  Dictionary says this is someone who is contrary and difficult to deal with.

CONTUMELIOUS 2018-07-23 Daily line from book 9 Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone (aka GOBEE): “He’s Scottish,” I amended, with a sigh. “Which means stubborn. Also unreasonable, intolerant, contumelious, froward, pig-headed and a few other objectionable things.”  Dictionary says this refers to someone’s behaviour as being insulting and objectionable.

AMBSACE 2018-07-23 Daily line from book 9 Go Tell the Bees That I Am Gone (aka GOBEE): 

“Men don’t like to share a woman. Unless it’s an ambsace.”
“An ambsace?” I was beginning to wonder how I might extricate myself from this conversation with any sort of dignity. I was also beginning to feel rather alarmed.
“That’s just what Madge called it. When two men want to do things to a girl at the same time. It costs more than it would to have two girls, because they often damage her. Mostly just bruises,” she added fairly. “But still.”

By definition, ambsace is the ‘lowest roll in a game of dice: 2 ones’.  See above for the vernacular meaning in the 1700s!

COUNTENANCE Posted by Diana Sept 30, 2023. A daily line from book 10 in progress:

William is pondering life after shaving in Jamie’s room at Fraser’s Ridge. “The thought made him feel more settled in himself. No matter what the future held, he still had both a past and a present, and those must be sufficient to keep him in countenance for what might come.”

The definition I know of countenance is ‘face’ but here Diana uses a less common definition, that of ‘support.’

 

be bad May 19, 2012

Filed under: OUTLANDERishness,Writing — Shawn L. Bird @ 7:54 pm
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A colleague of mine was telling me yesterday that she wants to write.  She is terribly impressed that I have written these books.  She would like to write a play.

But…

But she hasn’t.

Why?

Because she gets in the way.  She doesn’t know which direction to take a scene in, so she takes it neither direction.  She doesn’t know how many characters to use, so she has none.  She has so many things, that she has nothing.

I told her that she should give herself permission to write a crappy play.  If she can free herself from the idea that what she has written must be good, she can actually write SOMETHING.  Once there is something on the page, you can edit it into something better.  If there is nothing on the page, well, there’s nothing!

I read that Diana Gabaldon wrote Outlander as a practice novel.  She thought she’d try writing a novel, and since no one was ever going to see it, she could do whatever crazy thing struck her fancy.  She gave herself permission to have fun with the experience, and she did.

When you give yourself permission to be bad, you give yourself permission to take risks.  Let the voices in your head go nuts.  Catch what they say.  Don’t think about it.  Don’t worry if it’s ‘right’ or if it’s ‘good.’

Just let it BE.

Try writing the same thing from different characters’ perspectives.  Try different narrative styles.  You need to put the time in and explore the process.  You will find something interesting, but you won’t if you don’t let it happen.

Give yourself 15 minutes.  Tell the inner critic to leave you alone, and just write.  Don’t stop yourself from achieving your dreams.  Don’t be your own enemy.

Write it.

 

feeling guilty? April 5, 2012

Filed under: Grace Awakening,OUTLANDERishness,Writing — Shawn L. Bird @ 6:04 pm
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Crystal Stranaghan was the publisher at Gumboot Books who signed Grace Awakening.  Sadly, Gumboot is no more, but Crystal is still involved in writing and all sorts of other projects.  In this blog post, she writes about feeling guilty about finding time for writing.

I am thoroughly impressed by Diana Gabaldon who says she writes every day.  Good thing, considering how huge her books are, and how desperate her fans are for her to finish them!  I know that a little work every day adds up quickly, but I also know how difficult it is to carve out time to do the work.  Gabaldon posts ‘daily lines’ almost every day on her website and Facebook, so it appears to be true. 🙂  She is juggling a few different projects, but there is a little snippet of writing from something to feed the fans.

I seem to find time for the blog, but it takes a little more effort to fit in the novel work.  The most words seem to fill my brain just as I’m about to drop off to sleep.  This is not always conducive to adequate rest, I confess.

Crystal says she feels guilty for taking the time to write.  By contrast, I feel guilty for not writing! ;-P  I know when I am working on a novel, I am making an investment that will pay off in the future.

How about you? Are you guilty for writing or for not writing?  How do you carve time to write in your day?

 

True Crime March 2, 2012

Filed under: Commentary,OUTLANDERishness — Shawn L. Bird @ 6:43 pm
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“I greatly preferred dangerous criminals to be incompetent.”

Diana Gabaldon in The Fiery Cross.

.

Me, too!

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It may make you feel a little better about the incompetent crooks in government to read about some truly incompetent criminals who are now behind bars at the Stupid Criminals Hall of Shame.  With criminals, incompetence is good for the public.

 

write the magic February 15, 2012

Filed under: OUTLANDERishness,Writing — Shawn L. Bird @ 9:48 pm
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Little things kind of reveal themselves to me in the (process of) writing. A lot of people think that magic happens when you write, and it does, but they think, “Well you must be struck by inspiration, this magic bolt hits you and then you just sit down and … it must just pour out of you.”  Well no.  First you work and then the magic happens, if you’re lucky.  (Diana Gabaldon podcast Episode 3: The “Kernel Process”)

You have to write to find the words.  I tell my high school students to “think with your pen, not your brain.”  It’s an odd concept at first, but once the pen is moving (or the keyboard is clicking), the words tend to find their way onto the page (or screen).  If you wait for the thunderclap of inspiration, you’ll never get the words.  If you sit, ready to work, they flow by themselves.  Perhaps there won’t be thousands of them, perhaps they won’t all be brilliant, but there will always be something that you can use, even if only as a jumping off point for something else.

Think with your pen, not your brain.  That’s where the real magic is.