When a woman makes the choice to marry, to have children; in one way her life begins but in another way it stops. You build a life of details. You become a mother, a wife and you stop and stay steady so that your children can move. And when they leave they take your life of details with them. And then you’re expected move again only you don’t remember what moves you because no-one has asked in so long. Not even yourself. You never in your life think that love like this can happen to you.
~Francesca in Bridges of Madison County
by Robert James Waller.
It was hard to imagine what life would be once kids had grown and moved off to their own independent lives. Some women have invested so much in their children that they have to dig deeply to find that they are no longer who they were before children, and it’s time to find a new identity. It can bring depression and a sense of loss.
I confess, I was not one of those women. For me, departure of the children was a celebration and an immediate flowering. I started writing Grace Awakening a month after our kids moved out. A new life began on the page and a new world enfolded before me as I began interacting with authors. It made me thankful we’d had our kids so young. 🙂