With your cold grey touch,
my pain oozes up
in a thin crimson line
and drips
…………away
.……………….drop
………………….by
………………..drop.
.
.
.
.
FYI—>This is persona
With your cold grey touch,
my pain oozes up
in a thin crimson line
and drips
…………away
.……………….drop
………………….by
………………..drop.
.
.
.
.
FYI—>This is persona
wow!………..
Seems to be a lot of this …..
Yes.
so few words and such a big feeling conveyed. even the layout of words is meaningful to the context. You are a really talented person
Thanks.
I really enjoy this piece: nothing makes a great poem greater like a good shape!
I agree. Sometimes a clever use of shape can intensify the theme.
Wow, it’s so beautifully written.Great piece of writing 🙂
Thank you. Oh! and thanks for liking my Facebook page today Harpreet!
You’re welcome. I had to like your page; you’re a great poet.
Thanks
powerfully conveyed
thanks
I love the images in this one and it also has a great visual impact with the way you did the line breaks!
Thanks.
Its great. Its familiar ground, and its comforting that you put it out there. 🙂
Tell me more about what you’re saying?
I mean its great that you made it visible to others, and that hopefully eliminates stigma somewhat. I dealt with self harm many moons ago, and no one had a name for it; everyone thought I was trying to end my life when I wasn’t. I was just in extreme pain. Its comforting in the sense that people talk more about it than in the past, and people are at least dealing with it. In that, maybe some of the stigma surrounding mental illness can be minimized. Make sense?
I recited this poem to someone recently who battles with mental illness, and she said “but it only works once.” The first cutting episode the pain dripped away, but she was never able to get that feeling back again, which made me wonder of addiction is similar. Are people trying to get back to the euphoria of the first time? I do think we’re getting better about mental illness, we certainly deal with it more often in the schools, and I doubt there is more of it. I think we’re just more responsive.