Shawn L. Bird

Original poetry, commentary, and fiction. All copyrights reserved.

Dreams and names June 5, 2010

Filed under: Grace Awakening,Literature,Pondering — Shawn L. Bird @ 6:51 am
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Names…had potency. They pulled their owners in their wakes, the way that dreams can, the way you can wake up from sleep and believe that what you dreamed actually occurred. And even later, even when you realized the mistake, it was difficult to re-adjust your thinking.
But if dreams were potent, names were more so, especially the ones people chose for themselves. They might grow into the ones that were given to them, through the familiarity of use, if nothing else, but the ones they chose defined who they were like an immediate descriptive shorthand. (Charles de Lint. Memories and Dreams. p. 298)

Dreams touch us in diverse ways. Dreams of the bizarre, the hoped for, the feared all make appearances in our sub-conscious while we sleep. Usually they remain hidden, but if we come close to waking, to touching reality, then the conscience learns of their existence. When dreams touch awareness, then we touch the mystery and must sleuth out meaning or embrace the mystery. While the fears that wake us screaming in the night can paralyze us, we can also allow our subconscious to use dreams challenge us, inspire us or help us break through to a brilliant neural network of solutions

I often go to bed with a problem on my mind and awake to the solution fully formed. I have gone to bed thinking about right hand melody and left hand accompaniment patterns that would not go together.  The next morning I’ve sat down at the harp and played the previously impossible on the first try. The subconscious is amazingly useful when we harness the power. The dream does actually occur in these cases, contrary to De Lint’s suggestion, because the dreams create reality.

Just like dreams, names are powerful. We gift our children with names that we hope they will live up to. My daughter’s name means “strong and womanly.”  I think she has definitely grown into her name. My son’s name means “victory of the people” and I like the notion that his successes will help others. My name, a derivative of John, means “God’s gracious gift.” I was raised as a precious arrival, and definitely felt blessed and appreciated. Shawn is also, of course, more commonly a male name. Aside from the incorrectly addressed mail and being assigned to the all male dorm at college youth weekend, it hasn’t proven too problematic, at least since getting over the angst of youth. Perhaps I’m more inclined to celebrate the feminine with jewelery and shoes to counter the masculinity of the name.  I think male Shawns are quite different from female Shawns, and that’s an interesting concept! As De Lint says, the name I chose is perhaps more potent because it is a huge choice to join individual identity in the union of marriage.

The names of the characters in Grace Awakening are carefully chosen. The names reflect the characters’ roles and personalities, or are small salutes to special people. I spent hours and hours on name sites getting the perfect name for each one. The names frame the personalities. Click on the Grace Awakening site and scroll to the sub-pages at the bottom to see articles about this.

How does your name define who you are? Have you changed your name? Would you change your name? Why? Why not?

 

Poor Kristen June 2, 2010

Filed under: Commentary — Shawn L. Bird @ 6:53 pm
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Pity Kristen Stewart, a victim of her own fame and the juggernaut that is the Twilight hype. Speaking in an interview with Elle magazine Kristen likened the media frenzy to the trauma of being raped. We’ve seen in interviews in the last year that Stewart doesn’t like talking about her personal life. She is really quite shy and introverted. These qualities may seem strange in an actress, since acting is the epitome of extroverted behavior, but up until Twilight Stewart’s success in art films had not garnered her the extremes of public interest that is fueled by Twilight fan frenzy.

She signed on to the Twilight franchise early. Was she ‘asking for it’ by her willingness to take on this film? Considering the hysteria generated by the books, what did she expect the response to the movies was going to be?

Everyone deserves to have his/her privacy treated with respect, and we know that paparazzi are not particularly known for that. What do you think? Now that Twilight has brought her fame and fortune, do you think Kristen has any right to complain?

 

language & brain May 23, 2010

Filed under: Commentary,Reading,Writing — Shawn L. Bird @ 12:02 am
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The ability to speak a second language isn’t the only thing that distinguishes bilingual people from their monolingual counterparts—their brains work differently, too. … A new study published in Psychological Science reveals that knowledge of a second language—even one learned in adolescence—affects how people read in their native tongue. The findings suggest that after learning a second language, people never look at words the same way again. 

Wenner, Melinda. “The Neural Advantage of Speaking 2 Languages.” Scientific American Mind.  January 2010.

Melinda Wenner’s article in Scientific American fascinates me for many reasons.  I have friends whose children were born in bilingual environments, and it has always amazed me how  fluidly these children move between languages.  It has frequently been observed that students in French Immersion tend to be among the strongest in the school. Is this because they were already so, or have their brains been improved by second language learning?

I started learning my second language (French) when I was in grade 4.  I loved it!  It was like learning a special code, with the advantage that other people around the word could understand it, too.  In grade 12 I added a Spanish course and did very well at that at the time but, unfortunately before I could solidify it, I headed off as an exchange student to Finland, and before long even French was a struggle as my brain re-tuned to Finnish instead.  I was in awe of the students in my Finnish class.  We were the language stream, and besides Finnish (‘Äidenkieli’ or ‘mother tongue’) they took courses in Swedish, English, German, French and/or Russian.  How on earth did they manage it?  By third rotation when we came back to French class I couldn’t speak it properly anymore (I could read and understand without difficulty, but the Finnish pushed the French out of the  speaking centre).  Happily, both French and Finnish happily co-reside in my brain these days.  

While I was learning Italian earlier this year, I kept finding connections to other words I knew in Spanish, French or English which led to epiphanies of word meaning.   One epiphany resulted from learning the Italian word nebia which means fog.  Suddenly I had a whole new understanding of the English word nebulous.  While pulling on a door and reading the French tirer (to pull) I realised the connection to the word on Italian doors: tirare.  Do these words relate to the English verb to tire?  After all, it’s exhausting work to be pulling something.  What about the Italian word for ‘left’ sinistra?  The underhanded swordsman using the left hand was definitely sinister to his opponents.  All these additional layers of meaning start appearing as you read when you know other languages.

When one learns another language, or particularly several other languages, one begins to see the complex web that strings them together. If one opens up to the conceptual words that we don’t have in English, our world view expands even further.  For example, Finnish has the word sisu which connotes pride, courage, and fortitude.  The Finns claim sisu is what allowed them to decimate the Russians with 10:1 losses and led to  the only war-time settlement the Russians ever negotiated to stop the Winter War of 1939.   (It’s also the name of their strongest salt-licorice, which is fitting because it definitely takes some fortitude to eat it!)

I have enjoyed studying various other languages for interest sake over the years, although I gained no significant fluency.  I studied Esperanto, Japanese and most recently Italian.  It was particularly entertaining to be sitting at a restaurant table in Italy a couple months ago with my Finnish host parents and my Canadian husband, speaking English to him, Finnish to them, and Italian to the waitress!  It was especially clear to me then what this article suggests- speaking other languages is definitely a brain work out!

 

Why I love my job May 20, 2010

Filed under: Commentary — Shawn L. Bird @ 4:45 am
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I am aware that I am among the most blessed people on the planet because I absolutely love my job. Every day when I walk into the high school where I teach, I enter a dynamic world that is constantly new and constantly entertaining. The challenges are many, but the rewards are greater. There are only six more weeks of classes this school year, and as I prepare to bid farewell to this year’s kids and enter my annual two months of unemployment, I am pondering on how I got here, and what makes my job great.

I have not been out of school for more than six months since I was three. That’s when I began my love of learning at Mrs. Hamilton’s Bo Peep Kindergarten. My mother needed me out of the house. I think I was exhausting. I spent three years with Mrs. Hamilton, and several of the students in the kindergarten graduated with me at Okanagan Mission Secondary thirteen years later. I loved elementary school (all four that I attended) and even junior high, because I had great friends and I was curious. I loved learning new things and I had a lot of questions. In grade three, I loved writing stories and sharing them in show and tell. I planned to be a writer. I was about ten when I decided I was going to become a teacher instead. I planned to teach grade four or five. My grade four teacher, Mr Lavoie, and my grade five teacher, Mrs Nemeth, had completely opposite teaching styles but I adored them both. I was completely inspired to follow in their footsteps.

Although I had amazing teachers in a brand new school in a lovely forest setting, until grade ten, life in high school was not pleasant. I spent a lot of time writing poetry and long letters to friends in other places. I read constantly. I invented stories on my walk to and from school. I wasn’t a loner though; I belonged to youth groups, choirs, and volunteered hundreds of hours at the hospital. I belonged to a lot of school clubs: library, newspaper, yearbook, and musical theatre. I had an active, busy life. In the senior grades the students became respectful and tolerant of others again, and high school became much more pleasant. At this point I returned to the debate. Should I return to the dream of being a writer or stick with the  plan to be a teacher? I had some inspiring teachers in high school, like Mr. Keith, Mr. Swanzey, Mr. Wendell, and Mr. Moore. You may notice that some of those names appear in Grace Awakening. This is a small tribute to their influence, although the characters are flat and not at all the intelligent, innovative and inspiring people these men were in real life! It wasn’t until I entered teacher training and started observing in other schools that I realised what an amazing vision our principal Mr. Monteleone had for us at OKM.

I was still planning to teach elementary and I was in University of Calgary’s education department working toward that goal when a new life got in the way. Time to re-think the plan. We were moving to northern BC where there was no university at the time, so I transferred my credits to Athabasca University, an international leader in distance education, which would allow me to continue my studies anywhere in the world. It took several years, but eventually I earned a BA in English. Next I had to figure out how to earn my teaching credentials. The solution was an innovative program offered by Simon Fraser University to train teachers in the communities where they lived. Because I had a BA already, and was missing some of the general credits needed for elementary (like old nemises math and PE), I had to re-think my planned teaching level. I did my training to be a high school teacher instead. Although I hadn’t expected to focus on that level, I discovered that I really enjoyed working with teens. Being flexible at every stage allowed me to reach my goals, and it stood me in good stead as I taught a wide variety of subjects in countless subbing jobs and temporary teaching contracts.

My students come from all walks of life. They each have unique challenges and goals. They are fascinating and fun to be with every day, despite the frustrations of trying to get them to live up to potential some of them don’t want to reach. I mourn with them when tragedy touches our world. Loss of our kids before or after graduation due to accident or illness always devastates. Too much potential is lost when a young person dies. Most days are celebrations though, and no one knows how to celebrate like teens! No school day or even hour is the same. The students ensure my days are never boring, and their energy provides fuel for imagination. Each one offers me information about the world and growing to understand their needs and talents inspires me. I get to share great works of literature with them and coax their awareness and understanding of universal themes. I get to see skills develop as students learn to manipulate words in prose and poetry. I get to watch them grow through the years and graduate into adult life, where I hope that they carry gleanings of ideas from my classes that will fuel curiosity and engagement with learning throughout their lives. I’m always so happy to hear from students, even though lately I have trouble remembering their names from semester to semester!

So here I am today, in my eighteenth year of teaching high school, looking out my classroom window over the trees to Shuswap Lake shimmering in the sun. I live in one of the most beautiful places in the world and I’m blessed to have one of the most fulfilling jobs in the world. Life couldn’t get much better.

 

Truth is stranger than Fiction- Avatar and your backyard May 19, 2010

Filed under: Commentary — Shawn L. Bird @ 12:34 am
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Turns out that biological world envisioned in Avatar may not be so far off. This morning as I was waking up, I heard a fascinating interview with Diana Beresford-Kroeger on CBC’s The Current.  Beresford-Kroeger, an Ontario scientist, has written a book called The Global Forest, and I can assure you that I’ll be reading a copy soon to see if it’s as intriguing as the tidbits she shared on The Current.

For a lot of years we’ve imagined that we know what makes a biosphere work, and then along comes someone like this looking at new research that blows all our preconceptions away. Forests are far more complex than we imagined, and they provide far more measureable benefits that we’ve known. This is well beyond the stress relief of talking to your plants.  The forest is linked intricately to itself, and all the cycles of the planet.  It’s enough to make one look for a tail to plug into a branch.

Did you know that that fabulous aroma you enjoy while walking through a pine forest after the rain  or breathing in willow bark is actually good for you?   Forest walks can help alleviate depression and pain? Chemicals are being released by the trees that react with our body chemistry and work as well as ingesting pharmaceuticals.  This is the ancient wisdom that is being sought among indigenous forests even while they’re being mowed down. We don’t need to look to the Amazon for miracle cures from nature. There are plenty of pine forests across Canada just waiting to for you to stroll through and reap the endorphins (and other beneficial chemicals!).

Now I know why even though it always rained while I was at Girl Guide camp, I still was happy the whole time.

 

3 cheers for New Westminster! May 15, 2010

Filed under: Commentary — Shawn L. Bird @ 8:38 pm
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The municipality of New Westminster has just mandated the first ever living wage  in North America. How sane is that? Pay people enough that they can live in your community. What an innovative idea.

I know too many families with two incomes who are forced to visit foodbanks because they can’t afford to live on the wages they get. Minimum wage in BC is just over $8 an hour.  That means if you work eight hours full-time you earn $64 a day, $320 a week, $1280 a month before income taxes. Well, $1280 if you can even get full time work.

From the $1280 you have to take shelter, food, clothes, and transportation. Add in all the taxes on top of the goods, medical… It boggles the mind.  New Westminster has decided to pay all city staff or those working on city contracts double the minimum wage. 

Congratulations New Westminster for having the common sense to know that people who are paid fair wages can afford to support an economy. Not only can a person earning a living wage afford nutrious food, a comfortable place to live and to get to work. They may actually also be able afford to buy a coffee now and then at a cafe, go for a movie, have a meal out, put their kids into sports, and support charitable causes.

Thanks New Westminster for your new ideas on ministering best to those who live in your community.

 

Dancing in heaven May 12, 2010

Filed under: Commentary — Shawn L. Bird @ 5:58 am
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Doris Eaton Travis has passed away at 106. What a loss. What a life to celebrate. Who was Doris Travis, you ask? Quite simply, Doris was a legend. She was the last of the Ziegfield Follies and she was still dancing! What an inspiration.

Theatre gets in the blood, and the more you’re under those lights, sharing the rush of adrenaline with a company of like-minded souls and basking in the applause of an appreciative audience, the harder it is to escape the pull. I know why she loved Broadway and kept dancing throughout her life. It’s also no surprise that dancing kept her young and fit. Remember that episode of Fame from 1982 where the dancers left the rival school’s football team in the dust?

For years I struggled fitting exercise into my routine. I knew that I wouldn’t keep up a regime of jogging, swimming, cycling, or aerobics no matter how many people told me those were the best exercises for me. Yech. I have to be having fun with people I enjoy. I can’t socialize while swimming laps, and there’s no variety in jogging down the road. Dancing makes me happy. I love going to my twice weekly classes, laughing with good people as we try to learn new choreographies, and keeping fit in a fun way. It is always a rush when we perform. Oh, I know that I am not the best dancer and I struggle to remember everything I’m supposed to be doing from week to week, but that’s the laughter factor, and laughing is good for the heart, too.

I hope you’re dancing in heaven, Doris. Keep a place in your heavenly chorus line for me!

 

Fiction is truth May 11, 2010

Filed under: Grace Awakening,Literature — Shawn L. Bird @ 5:08 am
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Biographies bore me. I don’t care how insightful a biographer is, no one knows what’s going on inside someone else’s head. Autobiographies bore me, too, because we lie to ourselves even more than a biographer does. Here’s what I think the bottom line is: if you’re looking for truth, try fiction…. I’ve always believed that the lies we use to make our fictions reveal the truth with far more honesty than any history or herstory or life story. (Charles de Lint, Memory and Dreams, p. 186)

I love this book and over time here in the blog I’ll visit some of the many quotations I recorded. This Canadian fantasy writer has some brilliant observations.

When I was at a writing workshop with Gail Anderson-Dargatz last fall, she commented on how sometimes truth is too strange to make into a book. Think about that. She meant that truth really is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to be plausible. A reader will suspend belief just so far, and if an author pushes them too far past that, they dismiss it. Is this the ‘creative’ part of creative non-fiction? The population really can’t handle the truth. (This is too much cliché, isn’t it?)

Like de Lint intimates, fiction reveals truth. I know it. My novel is fiction. Mostly. It started as a true story, but then Grace shoved me out of the way and had her own story to tell. Grace’s biography isn’t my autobiography, but we do have a lot in common. There are lots of people who have read the manuscript and were able to recognize some of my secrets lurking between the pages. Some of the most bizarre moments on the pages are the truest, but you won’t believe it, so it’ll be okay.

 

Mother’s day of anguish May 9, 2010

Filed under: Commentary — Shawn L. Bird @ 5:24 am
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Mothers’ Day: another artificial holiday meant to cause disappointment in the population.

Mothers deserve a day, sure, but it is an awful thing to arbitrarily create a day that is bound to cause pain in so much of the population. We already have Christmas for that. Do we really need another day of anguish?

So here’s thinking of those who’ve lost their mothers either to death, disease, or dementia.  Here’s  to those whose memories of mother is one of abuse or neglect.  Here’s also to those who’ve lost their babies, whether before birth, just after, to childhood disease or trauma, or as adults. Here’s to those with empty arms who long to hold a babyof their own. Here’s to those whose living children are lost to them.

To my friends and all of you with hurting hearts this day, I send you all my love.  Today let us celebrate the strength of the human spirit to rise above our pain and sadness and  to carry on day by day striving to find joy and love wherever we can.

 

Ecstatic Ideas May 4, 2010

Filed under: Commentary,Literature — Shawn L. Bird @ 8:36 pm
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Last year by recommendation of my student Robyn, I read Markus Zusak’s The Book Thief. As I read, as is my habit, I dog eared the pages where I found wonderful thoughts. When I finished the book, I went back through all those dog eared pages to copy down the quotations that had struck me as being particularly profound. When I finished, I returned the book to Robyn.

A few days later, I went to post all those quotes, and they were gone! Somehow the computer had not saved them. Only the first two quotes remained. That means all the brilliance of Zusak’s prose was distilled into two thoughts. That is profound in itself.  Of the two, here’s the one that strikes me most deeply today:

“He was…enjoying the ecstasy of an idea, not daring just yet to envision its complications, dangers, and vicious absurdities. For now, the idea was enough. It was indestructible. Transforming it into reality, well, that was something else altogether. For now, though, let’s let him enjoy it.” (Zusak, Markus. The Book Thief. p 128)

So what is the idea that fills you with ecstasy? What indestructible idea of a dream tantalizes you between waking and dreaming?

Stay away from complications, dangers, absurdities and realities. Allow yourself to bask in the euphoria of possibility. Where could those ideas take you?

My ideas have brought me here.

Reality is a dream awoken.