In the acknowledgements at the beginning of Drums of Autumn, Diana Gabaldon observes that her husband says, “I don’t know how you keep getting away with this. You don’t know anything about men.” That made me laugh out loud.
Gabaldon might not really know men (though I think she captures them very well, myself), but she definitely understands what women WANT their men to be! Strong and tender, proud and humble, wounded and capable, physically arresting and self-effacing, full of desire and faithfully devoted, a gentleman and a serf. Her main character, Jamie Fraser, may not actually exist, but he is the complex bundle of contradictions that women desire.
This should be a consolation to the men: Jamie’s weaknesses are at the root of his strengths, and he is adored for them.