Shawn L. Bird

When you are on a long drive, it’s a good opportunity to talk to your mate.  It’s hard to find time in our busy every day lives to actually have uninterrupted conversation.  You can discuss difficult subjects, because no one can walk out.  It’s also an opportunity to discuss really positive stuff without being overheard.  Privacy is great in a car driving through the Rockies.

I invented a game on our last road trip.  We had just had one of those ‘hard conversations’ and needed to re-establish some positive feeling.

The frame was,

“Dear XXXX.  One thing I appreciate about you is…”

example,  “Dear OJ.  One thing I appreciate about you is how there is never any food left on our counters.”

Then it’s the other person’s turn to use the same frame to respond.

example, “Dear Mommy.  One thing I appreciate about you is how you always leave tasty snacks in unexpected places, like your purse, as special presents just for me.”

At the end of the trip, we felt pleasantly attached to one another, and thoroughly valued and appreciated.  These are very important aspects of relationship maintenance.