Topic #157: Describe the first person who broke your heart. And if you could take revenge on them now, would you? Did you ever think about it? What would you say to them now if you met them on the street?
I am sure that I am an oddity, but my heart has never been broken from a romantic attachment.
The first boy I loved remained a precious part of my life, and even though the time came when it was mutually understood there was not going to be a romantic future for us, the friendship remained strong and I can say that is probably is just as strong today though we haven’t seen each other in over a decade. If I saw him today I’d give him a big hug and prepare to start laughing at the way our lives are working out. Far from revenge, I’d be handing him a copy of Grace Awakening and challenging him to figure out all the minute memories of our real past that were the germs for the fantastic voyage that Grace experiences.
I was engaged, and the engagement was broken off, and even that seemed right under the circumstances and didn’t cause me to feel like my world was over. It was just the right decision at the moment. Of course, a week later everything had changed and two weeks later, we were married, a month earlier than planned. We remain so, today, thoroughly attached and very appreciative of each other.
I have had my share of gut wrenching rejections in other scenarios, but never by a young man to whom I had entrusted my heart. I guess that means that I chose wisely where to put my affections. Those were the biggies, but there were a few small crushes over the years, and even those dissolved amicably. There might have been a tinge of sadness, but no anger, frustration, pain or agony. I can divide myself into the feeling part who celebrates the joy, and when the opportunity for more painful emotions arrives, then I can switch to the logical part to understand the pros and cons of the relationship. It makes it easier to cope with the more unpleasant realities when you can see it logically. (It works for rejection notes from publishers and discussions with editors as well!)
When I was the source of the affection, and I didn’t return the feelings being tentatively expressed, I hope I was as kind and gentle to my suitors as the young men I had crushes on were to me. I would like have left them fond memories and no regrets.
Shawn L. Bird 